For those walking this path, and for those supporting them.

💔 The Shock and the After-Shock

When my dad passed, I was hit by two waves: grief and logistics.

Grief because I lost my dad.

Logistics because—he didn’t have a will.

Everything he owned—his house, car, accounts—was titled in his name alone.

So, instead of space to process the loss, I was suddenly learning how to become his personal representative, navigating legal steps I didn’t know existed.

“Losing a parent is already unbearable.

Trying to navigate probate on top of that can feel impossible.”

⚖️ Understanding Colorado Probate: The Basics

Probate is the legal process of gathering a deceased person’s assets, paying debts, and distributing what’s left. In Colorado, when there’s no will (called intestate), the court appoints someone—usually a family member—as the personal representative to manage it all.

Becoming the Personal Representative

To act on behalf of the estate, you apply to the county probate court to be appointed. Once approved, the court issues Letters of Administration—legal documents that prove you have authority to handle your parent’s affairs.

Without these, you can’t access accounts, transfer property titles, or sell anything.

Your Core Duties

Once appointed, Colorado law requires you to:

• File an inventory of assets within 90 days.
• Notify heirs and creditors.
• Manage the estate: gather property, safeguard assets, pay debts and taxes.
• Distribute what’s left according to Colorado’s intestacy laws (which prioritize spouse, children, and so on).
• Close the estate by submitting a final accounting to the court.

You’re legally considered a fiduciary, meaning you must act with fairness, honesty, and care on behalf of the estate.

🏡 Real Estate, Cars, and Other Titled Property

Here’s where I got lost. Because my dad’s home and car were titled solely in his name, I thought nothing could be done until probate finished.

But in Colorado, once you have Letters of Administration, you can begin managing and transferring assets during probate—not after it ends.

For real estate, you may need to execute a Personal Representative’s Deed to transfer or sell the property. Title companies will ask for your Letters and recorded deed before they’ll finalize the change.

🕰 The Timeline: Why It Takes So Long

Our probate process will take about a year from start to finish—and that’s normal in Colorado.

Here’s how it typically unfolds:

Stage	Timeline	Tasks
Months 0–3	Appointment of personal representative; gather paperwork; open estate account; file inventory
Months 3–6	Begin selling or transferring assets; work with CPA; file decedent’s final tax return
Months 6–12	Pay debts, distribute assets, and prepare final accounting
After 12 Months	File closing statements; wrap up taxes and estate

Probate can’t officially close until everything is sold, transferred, and the final taxes are filed—which often means waiting until the next tax season for certain documents. It’s slow, but that’s okay. Accuracy matters more than speed.

“You can’t rush probate—and you shouldn’t rush grief.”

💡 What I Wish I’d Known Earlier

1. You Don’t Have to Wait for Everything to Be Over

We thought we had to wait until probate closed to sell or transfer anything. In reality, once the estate is opened and I had authority, I could manage assets as needed.

Waiting added months of stress we didn’t need.

2. Clarify Every Timeline

Our lawyer said, “You’ll finish probate in about three months.” We heard, “You can start transferring and selling everything in about three months.”

What they meant was: by three months, we could have the inventory sold or transferred not once the three months are done. Miscommunication cost us time and peace.

3. Hire a CPA Early

Probate isn’t just legal—it’s financial. A CPA can help with:

• Your parent’s final income tax return
• Possible estate tax filings
• Capital gains if a home or vehicle is sold

Having professional help saved me from huge mistakes.

4. Trust Your Gut with Professionals

When you’re grieving, it’s easy to let others “take over.” I ignored my intuition about the first lawyers we hired because I was too numb to argue.

If something feels off, pause. Ask questions. It’s your right to seek clarity or even change attorneys.

5. Don’t Rush the Home

Right after my dad passed, I wanted to sit in his house exactly as he left it. But family members started “helping”—clearing the fridge, bagging clothes.

While I know they meant well, I wasn’t ready.

“If you’re grieving, you don’t owe anyone progress.’”

Take your time. Set boundaries. You only get one chance to walk through that space as it was.

6. Create a “Memory Box”

I began collecting things that reminded me of him—cards, notes, his favorite jacket.

Now when I see his type of car driving by, I don’t fall apart. I smile and whisper, “Hi, Dad.”

You don’t get over loss—you move through it. The pain doesn’t disappear, but it becomes lighter.

🧭 What You Can Do Right Now

1. Document everything.

Make a master inventory—photos, assets, accounts, titles. You’ll need it for probate anyway.

2. Hire a CPA.

Even for a short consultation. Taxes are complicated in estates, and mistakes can delay closure for months.

3. Protect your space.

If people are rushing you to clear out the home, say:

“I need a little time before we move anything.”

It’s a healthy boundary, not a selfish one.

4. Be selective with legal help.

Ask potential lawyers:

• How often do you handle intestate estates in Colorado?
• How do you bill (flat fee or hourly)?
• Who will actually manage communication?

5. Keep a grief ritual.

Maybe it’s a “dad box,” a photo wall, or writing letters to them. These little acts ground you.

6. Talk honestly with family.

Grief brings out everyone’s coping style. Tell your siblings or relatives what you need: time, communication, or space. It saves resentment later.

7. Give yourself grace.

Probate may feel endless. But grief doesn’t follow paperwork timelines.

Let both move at their own pace.

🌄 Grief Meets Administration

The strange thing about probate is that it forces you to balance two worlds:

one deeply emotional, one painfully practical.

One minute you’re sorting through your dad’s shirts, the next you’re emailing accountants about 1099s.

You’re handling grief in between signatures and notarization’s.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

• Grief is not linear. One week you feel strong, the next you’re back in tears.
• Being task-oriented helps—but don’t hide behind it. Completing forms gives structure, but still carve out space to feel.
• You can’t separate the heart from the paperwork. They coexist.

And when they collide—breathe. Go for a walk. Cry if you need to. Call a friend.

There’s no “right” way to do this.

🌿 What I’ve Learned About Letting Go

I used to think I’d feel better when everything was done—titles changed, estate closed, keys handed in.

But peace didn’t come from finishing the paperwork. It came from learning to sit with the reality that my dad is gone—and still with me in other ways.

Now, almost a year later, I still keep that “dad box.” Cards with his handwriting. The keys to his old truck.

When I see that same make and model drive by, I don’t break anymore.

I just smile.

Because I know it’s him reminding me, I’m watching.

“You don’t get over losing a parent.

You learn to carry their love differently.”

🕊 A Final Word to Anyone Going Through This

If you’re here because you’ve lost a parent and you’re navigating probate in Colorado, please know:

You’re not alone.

The process will take time. The forms will frustrate you. Family dynamics might overwhelm you. But none of that defines how deeply you loved them.

Take pictures before you pack. Keep one of their notes. Light a candle when it feels too heavy.

And remember—you’re doing your best.

One day, you’ll look back and realize you didn’t just manage an estate.

You honored a life.